l
V Amazing fella who 'taught me' movable script!
`designer_e*lame
TAG, DAMNED YOU, TAG!
JASMINE/YUKI-KO
A proud 4B'ian in heart, mind and soul~
Diagnosed with insanity, split personality since 24 Jan 91.
Game, anime, manga, fanfic lover.
Ships YAOI, BL, SHOUNEN-AI in general.
Draws, eats, sleeps, shits, sprouts nonsense, reads.
Sings(?), acts(?), dreams, being a general fucktard.
Wants to open a:
+ Coscafe
+ Orphanage
Wants to be a:
+ Counselling Psychologist
+ Fu Tai Tai(br>
+ Wife/Mother/Grandmother
Wants to do:
+ Take over the world
+ Experience what it feels like to be a guy for a day
+ Engage in YAOI!!!
+ Get married
+ Have at least 5 kids.
+ Be a goddess XD
+ slimming!
+ Cosplay
Things that she wants to see before she dies:
+ World Peace
+ Reduced Poverty
+ Her kids
Places to see before she dies:
+ Germany
+ Egypt
+ China(historical sites)
+ Italy
+ Russia
+ Japan
+ Thailand
+ Ireland
+ France
+ Museum of Sex XD
+ Benaki Museum(Greece)
Places to see after she dies:
+ Babylon
+ Egpyt
+ Heaven
Questions to ask the GOD(s)/GODDESS(es) in charge after she dies:
+ Who made the world?
+ Who made the pyramids?
+ Are there really life in space?
+ What do they do?
+ Can she have cookies in the afterlife?
+ Can she go and create her own puesdo-world?
+ Can they fall in love with mortals?
+ Are the myths real?
+ Are there really parallel worlds?
+ Do we really create new worlds by just thinking about them?
+ Is the dreamscape a reality, or reality the dreamscape?
+ Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
+ Can someone take her to see the history of the world in its entire-ty, in its exact time?
+ Who was she in her past/pastpast/pastpastpast (etc) life?
+ Why is there a prostate gland in a guy's ass if homo-sex is frowned upon?
TALOS GRYFALCRON
Who am I? Stupid question. Who are you?
Frankly if you want to know, pansy named me Hatsubame Matsurika.
Fuckin' tongue twister, I know.
Kratos would've been cool, 'cept some creature who called himself 'God of War' took it already.
So damn. I've got a female name.
Even though I'm a fuckin' MALE.
But call me Talos anyway.
I'm a fuckin' demon, unfortunately, trapped within a pansy ass mortal, who insists that i do not scar people IRL.
What? You don't like it? THEN FUCKIN' LEAVE ALREADY!
Tch...
About me?
Are you kidding mortal?
There is nothing nice at all to know about me.
I kill pink bunnies and eat them for breakfast.
But, nooooooooooooooooo, my pansy host, decides that bunnies are cute, and should not be eaten.
Who is the pansy?
Tch, Jasmine of course!
18 years of age soon, and she still hasn't grown ANY backbone yet!
Oh the horror!
And I'll let you in on a secret...
She is actually pretty evil on the inside.
Don't tell her i told you.
That's why I choose her.
The potential for evilness.
But like i said, she's too much a pansy and self-conscientious to do anything.
Anyway, a warning for you.(She threatened me to tell you.)
I'm rabid, I'm psycho and I'm not nice.
I'll bite anyone i want, and NOBODY can stop me!
Scratch that. Jasmine can.
Tch, self-introduction done.
Can i get on to my fuckin' bashing now?!
It is considered an offense to mow your lawn on a Sunday, because it causes too much noise.
It is illegal to flush the toilet after 10 P. (okayyyy...)
A man may not relieve himself while standing up, after 10 P.
Sweden
While prostitution is legal, it is illegal to use the services of a prostitute.
Korea, South
Traffic police are required to report all bribes that they receive from motorists. (WTF?!)
United Kingdom
With the exception of carrots, most goods may not be sold on Sunday. (Why carrots?)
London Hackney Carriages (taxis/cabs) must carry a bale of hay and a sack of oats.
Any person found breaking a boiled egg at the sharp end will be sentenced to 24 hours in the village stocks (enacted by Edward VI).
A bed may not be hung out of a window. (this is like, 'duh'.)
It is illegal for a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance. (WTF!!!)
Australia
Children may not purchase cigarettes, but they may smoke them. (What the fuck?!)
It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and black shoe polish on your face as these items are the tools of a cat burgular.
It is illegal to wear hot pink pants after midday Sunday. (EDWARD!)
Until the Port Arthur Killings it was legal to own an AK-47 but not legal to be gay. (kay, so killing is better then being gay?)
Greece
All electronic games are banned. (I will DIIIIEEE!!! COMMIT SUICIDE GENOCIDE!)
Canada
Citizens may not publicly remove bandages.
Wooden logs may not be painted.
The color of house and garage doors is regulated by city bylaws (a purple door get you a fine).
China
To go to college you must be intelligent. (well, duh... = .=;)
Denmark
Attempt to escape from prison is not illegal, however, if one he is caught he is required to serve out the remainder of his term. (= .=lll)
When driving, you must have someone in front of your car with a flag to warn horse drawn carriages that a motorcar is coming. (so someone has to walk in front of your car?)
France
No pig may be addressed as Napoleon by its owner.
An ashtray is considered to be a deadly weapon. (DIE DIE DIE! *whacks someone with an ashtray*)
Israel
If you have been maintaining an illegal radio station for five or more years, the station becomes legal.
America : by state
Alabama
It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.
Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.
It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.
You may not wear blue jeans down Noble Street.
If an animal control officer is in uniform, it signifies to the public that he is an animal control officer. (nonoNooooo.... He must be a human control officer. Well DUH!)
Alaska
Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.
Arizona
There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a cactus.
When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person posseses.
You may not have more than two dildos in a house. (*faint*)
No more than six girls may live in any house.
A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up.
It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling. (Nononononono!!! My teeth!)
Arkansas
A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise.
A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.
Dogs may not bark after 6 PM (muzzle up yer canines!)
California
City Council order reads: “No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash. (D'aawwww. Doggie, remember to put a leash n collar on me when we leave!)
Men who wear moustaches are forbidden from kissing women.
It is illegal to molest butterflies. (MMM, butterflies~)
Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.
One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o’clock.
Persons classified as “ugly” may not walk down any street. (Sadded)
Colorado
One may not mutilate a rock in a state park.
It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.
Cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight. (tail..light?)
Connecticut
In order for a pickle to officially be considered a pickle, it must bounce. (toing)
It is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.
It is illegal for fire trucks to exceed 25mph, even when going to a fire.
Florida
Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. (Owowow, not there! OUCH! How is this going to go anywhere now?! DAMN YOU PORCU----ow.)
It is considered an offense to shower naked. (Uh-huh. Kinky?)
The molestation of trash cans is banned.
Chickens are considered a ‘protected species’.
A women can be fined (only after death), for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of using self-beautification utensils. (Spirit: FUCK YOU!)
Georgia
Though being forced to close your business is bad enough, Athens-Clarke County forces one to obtain a license before holding a Going-Out-Of-Business sale.
It is illegal to carve your initials on a tree, even if it is on your own property.
The fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it.
Chicken must be eaten with the hands.
It is illegal to say “Oh, Boy."
It is illegal for a chicken to cross the road.
Idaho
Illegal for a man to give his sweetheart a box of candy weighing less than fifty pounds. (Expensive for the guy.)
Illinois
You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
The English language is not to be spoken.
Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire. (= .=;)
A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. (Does the rooster even understand?)
Bees are not allowed to fly over the village or through any of Kriland’s streets.
Indiana
Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March.
A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
Kansas
The installation of bathtubs is prohibited.
Kentucky
Dogs may not molest cars.
A woman may not buy a hat without her husband’s permission.
Louisiana
Biting someone with your natural teeth is “simple assault,” while biting someone with your false teeth is “aggravated assault.
BEHHHx. I'm tired, you can all read it yourselves.
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YTD was fun, ate swensens with liing, jaz & chun. And Chun is soooo damn kawaii. You go girl!
